health update

So, I went to a new Dr. that I was told that he can help me with my fibro. I got there, and he did all kinds of tests and said.. Yes, I can help you. So... We are on our journey.
He started me out on progesterone, antivirals, and a shot of vitamins B12, D and Folate. Ya... a shot.. every other day. That's fun. I just figure, if it helps.. it will be worth it. He also sent me to get blood work. A LOT of blood work. We just got it back and found that I am very low in vitamin D (which I found out can be a cause of my depression... or at least be adding to it) I also found out (which I always knew but needed a Dr. to believe/verify it) that my thyroid is way off. So, in addition to the meds. he had already started me on, now I am on vitamin D3-5000, DHEA, women's 1 a day. fish oil... and some immuno cream stuff... and a thyroid pill. So first thing in the morning I take a thyroid med... then an hour later at breakfast I take 4 vitamins, and every other day do a shot.. Then at bedtime I take 2-4 more pills (depending on where I am in my cycle for the progesterone and if I need sleeping meds that night.) and when I get the cream (they were out at the pharmacy that I tried to get them from) I will be doing that 2 times a day. I have a second appointment with him on the 29th of March. He told me to plan on feeling WORSE not better when I  go for that appointment.
I am really struggling with a couple things. Number 1 (obviously) is that I am not feeling well. Not only is pain worse.. and exhaustion to the point or RIDICULOUS. Like take a shower and feel like I have run 3 miles.... Stirring meat can sometimes be too much. I can't wait till this stuff starts helping. Number 2.... Most of what I was prescribed is vitamins..soooo not covered by insurance.. also, there is 1 brand in particular that the Dr. either make themselves or just like and so push. I always get weary with stuff like that. Kinda get the feeling "is this really going to help, or are they just trying to sell their vitamins". I have promised myself, my husband and the Dr. that I would try this and keep up with it for a fair amount of time. So, here we go.
The other thing is I have been walking. Every day (except weekends and the week we were sick) since I posted that I was going to start. (can't remember the exact date, but I think it was in Jan) I have been trying to eat better.. and I have GAINED weight. I can't tell you how frustrated I am about that. I keep hoping that when my hormones, including the thyroid, get stabilized that I will start loosing. I HATE that I am back to the nasty, fat, awful, blubber covered, person that I CAN'T STAND.
So, prayer needs are: This treatment helps, and fast. That my emotions can handle it. That I can get a little reprieve from me and the kids being sick. AND we are traveling to Abq this week on Sat. and home on Tues. Which is a short trip and the trip always hurts.
Thank you God for providing this Dr. for me. Thank you for the financial ability to go to see him and to get the vitamins and meds that he wants me to take. Thank you God for giving me the strength to get through this time. Thank you for friends that want to pray for me through all this.

Sick week

Well, we are coming out of the sickest week our family has ever had. Every single one of the five of us had Influenza type A. The nice thing was we were sick all together so we just laid around and no one missed out on anything because of anyone else. :) In addition to the flu, I also had bronchitis. I was in the ER on Tuesday. Went in for a followup on Wed. with my dr and he said he was surprised they didn't keep me in the hosp. He said I "couldn't be sicker if I tried". Don't challenge me doc!!  Sick weeks can be hard, it was emotional for me because I felt like a bad mom to not be caring for my sick little ones. (who were just fine on their own and didn't need me, it was all mental) I hated my hubby being sick. He has never been that sick for that long. He was grumpy. :) Today has been a day of much cleaning and sanitizing trying to get this illness GONE so we can just move on. Pretty much everyone is better. I still having breathing issues if I try to do.. well, anything and I am pretty much exhausted just from getting out of bed, but that is also partially because of my other issues. I know this too shall pass and the coughing will go away and we will all remember "that time we were all so sick" (and probably blame Ethan with love because he was the first to get it.) Just trying to keep the positive in perspective.
1. No school all week!! (with the exception of Ethan that only missed 1 ACC class on Tuesday)
2. Quality time. (ok.. that might be pushing it a little)
3. Caught up on TV shows. (haha!)
I would also like to take this time to say how proud I am of my Ethan who got a 95 on his first French test at ACC. He is continuing to excel so much. Makes a mama proud!!! 
Ezekiel is still doing CAP and loves it very much. I see him growing in maturity and emotionally every day. God has given him such a gift for grace and love for others. I can't wait to see how He uses that in my dear Ez as an adult.
Asher, well he hasn't found his niche quite yet. :) He is so smart and does well at everything he chooses to do. He is happy and loving and smiley (although he would rather not kiss mom anymore so we are working on that) hehe
Ok that is us! Thanks for "listening"
Thank you God for getting us quickly over this nasty illness. Thank you for my family coming together and helping each other as we could as we were all recovering. Thank you that it wasn't any worse than it was. Thank you for the blessing of the school that Ethan is able to go to free for now. Thank you for the grace of him doing so well in it. Thank you for getting us involved with this CAP group for Ez. Thank you that he is enjoying it so much. Thank you for Asher. Thank you for his silly, fun loving ways. Thank you for creating family and for using it to teach us so much about our relationship with you and your love and care for us. Thank you for friends that are willing and able to pray for us in time of plenty and time of need.

update on schedule

Well, I am happy to announce that since I posted on the 10th.. every week day we have done our Bible reading and walking time. I have gotten up to 3 times around the "circle" of houses in our neighborhood. That equals 1 mile. I don't go around 3 times every day. I go less if I need to physically, but I do go EVERY DAY. I am really proud of myself for getting into this and keeping it going! Today is a REALLY bad day cause of the cold coming through and all that I have done today, but I still did everything I needed to do today. I am really praying that I don't get stuck in bed by the end of the week. Praise God Ethan has a license now so if I need to be in bed, he can keep things going on the outside. Which is great since he has 3 college classes to get to every week. Anyway, that is about it for now I guess. I am going to lay here and wait for my drugs to kick in. :D
Thank you God for giving me a schedule that will make us better in so many ways. Thank you for keeping me going even on days like today when I just want to stop. Thank you for my friends that love me and keep me going with encouragement. Thank you for a patient, helpful family for the days that I am in need of just those very things. Thank you for the few days of spring that I could enjoy feeling pretty good. Thank you for my husband that as always is happy to help when and where he can.

New Schedule

Well, I spent the weekend trying to figure out what I can do for me and the boys that will get us in a better place. I need to be in a better place emotionally, and my boys spend WAY too much time on computer/TV. Asher and I are getting seriously chunky and all the boys and I are out of shape. School takes less than an hour a day for us at this point (Ezekiel is only doing it 2 days a week...
So, here is my thought. By 10 in the morning we are all sitting around the table for Bible study time together. It is just us reading silently, but all together. That will give us accountability and togetherness. Then we are going to walk for at least 30 minutes. As we get in better shape the boys will start jogging/running. We are also looking to invest in a weight bench so hubby and the boys can work on that. Then we will do school together if the boys aren't already done for the day. Then lunch time. Then that just leaves the afternoon for laziness. :)
Today was day one and I think it went pretty well. Hopefully, this is day one of some new and better habits.

Thank you God for helping me figure out a way for the boys and I to get back on track. Thank you for giving me the desire to better us and for giving me the tools to do it. Thank you for giving us a safe neighborhood to walk/run in. Thank you for the good attitude of my kids as we go into this, and help me to stay on top of it and not get lazy with it.

whine, whine, whine.

I haven't posted in a while because I feel like I do a lot of whining. I know on the one hand that is why I set this up to kind of have a journal of my journey but it seems like there is more complaining than anything. I am trying to be in a good frame of mind and say, this is what my life is like today, good... bad... or ugly, it is what I have to deal with so it is what I need to talk about. Then the other part of me says, "Who wants to see this??" I kinda get in a who cares anyway kind of mode. I know this is just me being emotional and blah, but maybe I am right. Maybe this isn't the best medium for my journaling because who really does want to read about my daily rant about all things frustrating, hard, and ill in my life. I guess part of me hopes that whoever does read this at least prays for me. I do try to talk about things that are good and exciting. Like the biggest thing right now is my son is about to get his drivers license. Wow.. that is a biggie.. :) Well, anyway that is about all I have to say tonight. I am kinda in a funk and really could go on and on for hours... but I won't. hehe. Thanks for "listening"

Bad blogger

I am so bad at this!! I think one of the things that I struggle with more than anything is sticking with things that I start. I do really good to start.. and then, not so much. I think about it a lot.. but I just don't DO it. Sigh. Well, now I am doing it. Update on me... This has been a REALLY bad week. I have been in bed most of the week which has been extra hard because hubby has been out of town. I have been taking pain meds regularly throughout the day. I know what the problem is, it is the weather here. "Winter" here is a daily change.. sometimes hourly. The temperature can shift by as much as 40 degrees in a matter of a couple of hours and that just KILLS me. That and my hormones this week and being busy over Thanksgiving weekend just has me in the weeds. Unfortunately, I think I am in for the long haul for the winter. I don't see things improving anytime soon. This is really hard for me because being in pain and unable to function normally is SUPER frustrating. I am praying for wisdom on how to get through this time. When to stop.. when to push through.....I think the thing that I am the most thankful for in my life is my family. My husband and my kids are the most incredible people God has put on this earth. My boys will do anything for me, from cleaning the whole house including vacuuming MY room..To now that Ethan is driving he is willing to take me anywhere. Even to girls night last night. :D I know it is the example of their father that has their hearts where they are. My husband will work all day and still come home and take care of me. He ends up doing my job and his so often. I feel bad, but blessed. God is good!
Thank you God for my life. Thank you for the good times and the hard times. Thank you for my hubby getting home safely today. Thank you for my kids. Thank you for the amazing people that they are. Thank you for my husband and for the example of a good father/person that he is. Thank you for all your blessings.

Back

So, after being gone for several weeks, I am back to update. I was blessed to have 2 weeks with my little sis and her hubby and new family. I had the greatest time!!!  As usual, my body gave out the second I was home (nearly) and I ended up with a stomach flu. BLAH.
I have to brag on my boys for a minute though. My boys are so great. :D While I was gone they kept up with their school and chores, they did all they were supposed to do and then some. They even got the house spotlessly clean for me the day day before I came home. They got along well and there was only 1 major problem... Ezekiel cut his finger really badly. But, he is doing well and that was WHILE hubby was home. :) Ok.. I guess that is the update for now.
Thank you Lord for my boys. Thank you for their good behavior. Thank you for hubby and his willingness to let me leave. Thank you for the ability to go and be with my sister. Thank you for all your many blessings!