New Schedule

Well, I spent the weekend trying to figure out what I can do for me and the boys that will get us in a better place. I need to be in a better place emotionally, and my boys spend WAY too much time on computer/TV. Asher and I are getting seriously chunky and all the boys and I are out of shape. School takes less than an hour a day for us at this point (Ezekiel is only doing it 2 days a week...
So, here is my thought. By 10 in the morning we are all sitting around the table for Bible study time together. It is just us reading silently, but all together. That will give us accountability and togetherness. Then we are going to walk for at least 30 minutes. As we get in better shape the boys will start jogging/running. We are also looking to invest in a weight bench so hubby and the boys can work on that. Then we will do school together if the boys aren't already done for the day. Then lunch time. Then that just leaves the afternoon for laziness. :)
Today was day one and I think it went pretty well. Hopefully, this is day one of some new and better habits.

Thank you God for helping me figure out a way for the boys and I to get back on track. Thank you for giving me the desire to better us and for giving me the tools to do it. Thank you for giving us a safe neighborhood to walk/run in. Thank you for the good attitude of my kids as we go into this, and help me to stay on top of it and not get lazy with it.

whine, whine, whine.

I haven't posted in a while because I feel like I do a lot of whining. I know on the one hand that is why I set this up to kind of have a journal of my journey but it seems like there is more complaining than anything. I am trying to be in a good frame of mind and say, this is what my life is like today, good... bad... or ugly, it is what I have to deal with so it is what I need to talk about. Then the other part of me says, "Who wants to see this??" I kinda get in a who cares anyway kind of mode. I know this is just me being emotional and blah, but maybe I am right. Maybe this isn't the best medium for my journaling because who really does want to read about my daily rant about all things frustrating, hard, and ill in my life. I guess part of me hopes that whoever does read this at least prays for me. I do try to talk about things that are good and exciting. Like the biggest thing right now is my son is about to get his drivers license. Wow.. that is a biggie.. :) Well, anyway that is about all I have to say tonight. I am kinda in a funk and really could go on and on for hours... but I won't. hehe. Thanks for "listening"

Bad blogger

I am so bad at this!! I think one of the things that I struggle with more than anything is sticking with things that I start. I do really good to start.. and then, not so much. I think about it a lot.. but I just don't DO it. Sigh. Well, now I am doing it. Update on me... This has been a REALLY bad week. I have been in bed most of the week which has been extra hard because hubby has been out of town. I have been taking pain meds regularly throughout the day. I know what the problem is, it is the weather here. "Winter" here is a daily change.. sometimes hourly. The temperature can shift by as much as 40 degrees in a matter of a couple of hours and that just KILLS me. That and my hormones this week and being busy over Thanksgiving weekend just has me in the weeds. Unfortunately, I think I am in for the long haul for the winter. I don't see things improving anytime soon. This is really hard for me because being in pain and unable to function normally is SUPER frustrating. I am praying for wisdom on how to get through this time. When to stop.. when to push through.....I think the thing that I am the most thankful for in my life is my family. My husband and my kids are the most incredible people God has put on this earth. My boys will do anything for me, from cleaning the whole house including vacuuming MY room..To now that Ethan is driving he is willing to take me anywhere. Even to girls night last night. :D I know it is the example of their father that has their hearts where they are. My husband will work all day and still come home and take care of me. He ends up doing my job and his so often. I feel bad, but blessed. God is good!
Thank you God for my life. Thank you for the good times and the hard times. Thank you for my hubby getting home safely today. Thank you for my kids. Thank you for the amazing people that they are. Thank you for my husband and for the example of a good father/person that he is. Thank you for all your blessings.

Back

So, after being gone for several weeks, I am back to update. I was blessed to have 2 weeks with my little sis and her hubby and new family. I had the greatest time!!!  As usual, my body gave out the second I was home (nearly) and I ended up with a stomach flu. BLAH.
I have to brag on my boys for a minute though. My boys are so great. :D While I was gone they kept up with their school and chores, they did all they were supposed to do and then some. They even got the house spotlessly clean for me the day day before I came home. They got along well and there was only 1 major problem... Ezekiel cut his finger really badly. But, he is doing well and that was WHILE hubby was home. :) Ok.. I guess that is the update for now.
Thank you Lord for my boys. Thank you for their good behavior. Thank you for hubby and his willingness to let me leave. Thank you for the ability to go and be with my sister. Thank you for all your many blessings!

My week

I am happy. I have done well this week! I haven't had any of the crankies that I was worried about. I have had some emotional issues, but I don't think that is related to the meds, I think that just is because I was good ole plain upset! I feel a lot better pain wise. I actually got quite a bit done today. I even cleaned the carpets in my house! I feel so much better about how my house looks now! That is one of the most frustrating things for me about my condition is that I am a VERY clean person and to watch my house go downhill... I am blessed to have a hubby and children that will clean up for me, but it is better when I can do it myself. Better emotionally. Thank you for all the prayers! 
Thank you God for a good day! Thank you for the ability to take care of my house. Thank you for the boys to help me move furniture. Thank you for friends lending me the machine to get my carpet clean. Thank you for the medication to help me feel better enough to do these things. Thank you for friends for prayer!

Pray for guys

Well, I guess this post is to ask for you to pray not only for me over the next week, but for my guys as well. I just started a round of steroids. That is good and bad. The good, it should kill this never ending flair... The bad, it makes me feel sick... the ugly, one of the side effects (which from the comment hubby made, I think I get) is a bad case of the grumpies. Not only that, but I should start my cycle any day now.. so, I will have double the grumpies. I am hopeful that I can be spared from this for this weeks so my family doesn't feel the need to duck and cover. Any prayers you can send our way would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for your support! :D
Thank you Lord for the blessing of medication. Thank you for the Dr's that have the knowledge to help me. Thank you for my family and their willingness to put up with me. Thank you for loving me!

To do list

To do today:
Clean bathroom
Go to store
School kids
Grade school
Make dinner
Vacuum
...............
Wow.... the list can go on and on. Over the years I have had to teach myself the different "to do" lists. There is my list of things I want to/need to do, then there is the list of things that ACTUALLY get done (which could have nothing to do with the list I was PLANNING on getting done) and I have learned over the years that that list of things that does get done, is God's "to do" list. We forget that God has our days planned. Down to the seconds..From what cleaning should I do today... to every breath that we take. I have learned that my personal to do list has changed as well. I am now not as concerned about getting the dishes done or the mopping done.. now my to do list has things on it like, get out of bed. Sit with the kids while they do school. Sometimes that turns into sit in the chair in the living room while they do school. Some days making dinner gets done.. Then I have to put things on my to do list that I never expected to have to list to get done.. like getting out of bed ( I know I already said that.. but who thinks that have to "to do" that?!!?!?) And, then I have to try to stay up until a certain time. The clock hits 3 in the afternoon and I want to fall back into bed and stay there till tomorrow or later.
I want to encourage all the moms out there when you are making your to do list for the day, pray while you are doing it. Ask God to show you what He has planned for your day. Then don't let your list become so important that you are upset if "all" you get done in a day is 1/3 of that. God has the most important things for you to do already mapped out. At the end of the day, you can thank God for ordering your day and helping you complete exactly what He had for you to do!!
Thank you Lord for ordering my life. Thank you for giving me your "to do" list every day. Thank you for giving me the strength to get done what you want me to do every day. Thank you for as little or as much as it feels like to me. Thank you for caring what I do in my day. Thank you for wanting the best for me. Thank you for loving me.