Hubby and I have made a decision this last week. We have decided and told the parents that I will not be keeping any kids other than my own on a regular basis. So, starting the beginning of Aug. I will not have full time extra kids. I am excited about that and I am also struggling. I know it is hard to find good, safe child care that is actually affordable. I am in the process of putting my pride aside and realizing that I am not the end all be all savior of everyone.. That is God. :) I am just a mom that has a family of my own to worry about and a health condition that I need to focus on getting under control.
All that being said... Things on the health side are far from under control. I took meds last night and still had such bad pain all night that it woke me up every time I moved. I hate nights like that. Today, I wish I could have stayed in bed. Since I can't, I am spending the day in my chair.. that is pretty much the next best thing. I am trying to get the energy to finish laundry and clean my house. I REALLY don't want my Aunt to see my house in the state it is in.. but, that just might have to happen. I have to also put my pride aside and say.. I can't do it sometimes, and when I can't, this is what you get! Good thing my family loves me for me I think... :)
Thank you God for giving me the strength to know when I am done and to be able to say it. Thank you for giving me my husband to stand by my side and encourage me and speak up for me when I can't. Thank you for my family that loves me and is understanding even when I am not up to my best. Thank you for giving me the strength to do what I needed to do for the time that I have done it and thank you for this time with just my family. Thank you for your love and care for me.
Love you Tania <3
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